My need and desire to control everything in my life right now stems from my overwhelming feeling of not being in control of anything. I am bouncing back and forth, swirling around, rebounding off of everyone and I feel as lost as ever. I always return here, after every round. I just keep ending up back at what feels like the beginning. And every time I am back at the beginning, I am once again alone and the reflection feels like I've made a fool of myself.
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